Last week was my first week back at school. It was the first time in three months that I was seeing fellow students, many of whom have not heard of my broken engagement.
If I collected a dollar for every Mazal Tov I received, I could probably drop out of college and move to Hawaii. Perhaps that is an exaggeration.
All joking aside, I was not offended when people said Mazal Tov. They truly wished me well and simply were uninformed. I actually almost felt sorry for them when I saw their reaction to the news: "I'm not engaged" Some people wanted to fall through the floor while others just stared in shock. One girl wished me a Mazal Tov. I told her that I am single. She ran away as if on coals. She came back to me and said: "Seriously, everyone, and I mean everybody breaks their engagement." I laughed so hard. Such a bitter laugh. Sure, that is why I broke my engagement, to be like everybody else. I smile, I tell people that I am okay. Most of them do not believe me. It is okay, as long as they leave me alone.
The reason I am writing this is because there are quite a few people who act so inappropriately and say things that blow me away. And if I was okay before, then after comments it takes much more strength and energy to retain normalcy.
People think they are entitled to know everything bout everyone and have no problem asking anyone.
The following things happened to me. I wish they never happened and then they would be fiction, but they are not.
A young man comes over to me and says: "So when can we sit down and talk. I want to hear everything. Why and how your engagement ended."
I was shocked. Totally shocked. I barely knew they guy. Who does he think he is?
Someone told me that when I am ready, he wants to know everything.
I smiled. "How about never?" I thought to myself as I walked away.
A girl told me she wants to have dinner with me. That's cool. I have dinner with people all the time.
As we sit down with our trays of food, she says: "Tonight I will be your shrink. Tell me everything"
I was so tired, my head was stuffed, I did not get enough sleep. And as I looked at her with my exhausted eyes all I could think of was: REALLY? I mean, Seriously?! I Can't!!!
I also was told that a group of acquaintances was sitting around the Shabbat table and I was the topic of discussion. They were saying that they are afraid I would suffer from a nervous breakdown. Thank you for the honor of making me your topic of discussion, but please leave me alone. Thank you very much. I mean, some of those girls did not see me in a number of months, we hadn't spoken, anything! It was just frustrating that instead of feeling cared for, I felt intruded on.
Or I love this, someone called me up and let me know how difficult it was for her to muster the courage to call me.
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| Image: blogs.citypages.com |
Now what am I supposed to do? Praise her for her courage? I do not think so!
Would love to hear your thoughts.
