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I am not Charedi. But I am not not Charedi either.
I value learning tremendously.
To put it frankly, I go out with various "types".
This one time a close relative of mine tried to set me up with a close friend of his.
It was a match that was made in heaven.
The idea was born over a year ago, but I was seriously involved with my then fiance.
But then I was no longer engaged, but then the guy got engaged.
But then, he broke his engagement. So when we were finally both available and interested in meeting, a substantial amount of time had elapsed and the hopes were placed high.
We went out. And he was Israeli. And he was Charedi. And he spoke for three hours straight. And I smiled. And it was bad.
Of course he wanted to go out with me again. I was just so sweet and quiet and irresistible.
I did not want to go out again but since it was such a close friend of a close friend, and since he was probably so nervous or so smitten or whatever it was, I gave it another shot.
Not bad.
We went out again. The date was six hours long. I am not a six hour date type of girl. I prefer coffee, hello and good-bye type of dates. Not eat, drink, walk, run, swim type of dates. This was crazy because we were so different and because I do not like to be in touch through the Shadchan after a third date (or even a second one but I didn't think he could handle that).
But I thought about it. And I said yes to a fourth date.
And then I heard his answer: "I like her, but we are both leaving (this was right before Passover) so let us date whoever comes up and if upon return we are both available, we'll go out again."
EXCUSE ME. Just date everyone you like and see if we're available. Are you totally out of your flipping mind? Do you really think you will meet a girl out there who can come close to me?
I was fuming. Absolutely fuming.
He called erev yom tov. I picked up the phone. He asked for my relative.
Guy: Hi, is X there?
Me: No, he is out now. Who is this?
Guy: This is guy.
Me: Oh, Hi Guy, this is Me.
Guy: Oh hi, it is just that X called me and I am calling him back.
Me: Ok, but this is Me (!!)
Guy: But I thought that this was X's private number
Me: Listen, it is not his private number. (Will you please acknowledge that I am on the phone and stop stammering and find the guts to say hello how are you?)
Understanding somewhere in my deep subconscious levels that this was disinterest at its worst, and an non-existent ability to communicate at its best and trying to process it in my crazy mind I plunged for the gold.
Me: I must tell you, I was surprised that you did not want to go out with me after our last date (Six Hours for G-d's sake. Who does that?)
Guy: Ok.
Me: Ok?
Guy: Ok.
Me: Ok.
and as they say: Have a good Yom Tov.
