Showing posts with label haredim. Show all posts
Showing posts with label haredim. Show all posts
Aug 26, 2011
Aug 25, 2011
No End to the Madness
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| Image: http://images.travelpod.com/ |
In addition to the restrictive dress, prescribed behavior, now the charedi community sees shopping in the market "immodest and immoral."
For more information, see the following article.
Aug 11, 2011
First Marry Then Date
Says Rabbi Teller.
Oh, Those sweethearts in Teaneck who date for three years...
College Smells
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| Image: http://www.werakak.com/ |
Chana wrote a post this morning which totally rocked my day.
There are elements in the Haredi world which are extreme.
The problem I have with them, is that the extremists aren't shunned by the community.
Quite the opposite, the fanatics are usually looked up to and most respected in the community.
Jan 6, 2011
Just Because He is The Cutest
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Some things are arguable and some things are not because they are objectively true.
One of those facts is that my brother is the cutest creation on earth.
He is only ten years years old but is extremely smart and has an amazing sense of humor.
He keeps me laughing for hours on end.
Last night he was looking at my YuConnects profile (don't ask why, it's a long story), and he asked my mother in pure astonishment: Tanya is Machmir?! (Modern Orthodox Machmir)
Well, in line with my parents philosophy of diverse and versatile education, he was shipped (actually flown) into Bnei Brak to learn in a new environment. He went with my other younger brother, who is also absolutely phenomenal by the way, but I'll write about him another time.
This brother of mine wrote an article about his experiences... Share your thoughts and comments.
My name is Ariel, and I am ten years old. Last month, my parents sent me to learn in Bnei Brak for a month. They sent me to live with close friends on Tzanz Street right across the street from a shul and a yeshiva.
Before I actually went on the plane, I would like to tell you about my emotional state at that time. I was quite scared to go, I was afraid first of all to be apart from my parents and would miss them too much. I was also concerned that the boys in the school would be unwelcoming, and indifferent to me. I did not want to break down, but I knew that it was important that I make some friends.
My parents tried to encourage me that it would be so good for my learning, I would learn to speak Hebrew with an Israeli accent, and I would make new friends. It did not help my condition. But I had no choice, and off I went to greet my new adventure.
When I arrived in a taxi , I carried my bags up the three flights of stairs and The mother of the house welcomed me with warm words. She had been warned of my fears by my mother, so she took special care to be extra nice to me. Because of Chanukah, the school was closed for a few days for Chanukah vacation, so we arranged for my new rebbe to learn with me during vacation and prepare me for the gemara that the class was learning. This turned out to be a wonderful thing, because by the time school started three days later, I knew the gemara quite well, and the rebbe knew me and I really liked him. He helped me so much, by informing all the children to welcome me, a boy from Moscow who came to Israel to Learn Torah. I just want to add a word about this rebbe. He really surprised me. Although there were 38 children in my class, and my rebbe has a big family of his own, he offered to come over to my house on Shabbos to learn with me extra. I was amazed at his readiness to give me so much attention and with incredible patience. For example, when a child did not know the correct answer to a question, he would go along to the next boy. But if I would be the boy who did not know the correct answer, he would patiently say the answer and have me repeat it. The other boys were not only not jealous, but they even praised me and said how the rebbe likes me. All their kindnesses to me made me feel a bit uncomfortable, because somehow I did not feel deserving. I wondered how I would act in their place.
Baruch Hashem, the month passed quite fast, and I indeed made many nice friends. I was invited to a different friend almost each day, and we played soccer and a game called ga-ga ball. There was one boy who I really got friendly with and I certain similaritites with him. He had also come from a different city (Yerushalayim), and he had a computer in his house, which made me feel at home. Only I knew that he had the computer. His parents and siblings always made me feel very welcome.
I would just like to end my article with a few things I learned about living in Bnei Brak. Although it is much different than Moscow, there are certain things that I found very inspiring. For example, a few of the boys in my class were so serious about their learning. They would ask questions on each tiny detail in the gemara and would listen to the answers with very great intent. Compared to my class in Russia, where there are only seven boys, it was a very interesting experience to be in a class with 38 kids. I loved seeing children everywhere I went on the street, and everyone is Jewish. I felt so comfortable to walk around with my tzitzis out and to just be a frum boy, one of a million more.
I think about what my parents told me before I left for the month. That I would learn a lot and make new friends. Although it was a bit scary, I am so glad that I was able to go. And even though I do not want to actually leave home, I can still say with honesty, that I miss my month there.
Jan 3, 2011
Movie on Sexual Abuse in the Frum Community--Narrow Bridge
Watch and make sure to share your thoughts and opinions...
Another short, but thought provoking movie is "The Stranger": what makes people define themselves in certain circumstances.
I Beat Anorexia
Eating disorders a problem among haredim
Health experts say illness remains widely ignored in Orthodox Jewish communities, as families worry the stigma of mental illness could ruin arranged marriages; strict food rituals of fasting and remaining kosher can also exacerbate problem
Associated Press
Hilary Waller remembers begging her mother to let her fast on Yom Kippur. At 10 years old she was a bit too young, but embracing the rigid discipline seemed desperately important.
"It felt like I was practicing not eating. It was something that was reassuring and gave me strength and a sense of pride," said Waller, a 28-year-old teacher at a religious school in Blue Bell, Pennsylvania.
Weighty Problem
Report: Child obesity high in Israel / Sarit Rosenblum
OECD report indicates 26% of Israeli children suffer from excessive weight, compared to 33% in US. Adult obesity rates lower at 17%
Full story
It was the same rush she got years later in college each time she saw the scale tip downward. Waller, who suffered from anorexia, starved herself until she stopped menstruating, lost some of her hair and was exercising several times a day.
Health experts say eating disorders are a serious, underreported disease among Orthodox Jewish women and to a lesser extent others in the Jewish community, as many families are reluctant to acknowledge the illness at all and often seek help only when a girl is on the verge of hospitalization.
Several studies indicate a rise in the problem, and those who treat eating disorders say they are seeing more Jewish patients. A new documentary, books and facilities have cropped up to help.
Waller's family, which belongs to the Conservative branch of Judaism, fasted only on Yom Kippur, but she began fasting other holidays. "And not for religious reasons," said Waller, who checked into residential treatment after college, more than a decade after she began struggling with the illness.
As eating disorders have become less taboo in mainstream US culture, they remain widely ignored in Orthodox Jewish communities, as families worry the stigma of mental illness could ruin arranged marriages for the patient and even her siblings. Strict food rituals of fasting and remaining kosher can also exacerbate the problem.
Mixed messages
Israel has one of the highest rates of anorexia, bulimia and binge eating in the world, said Dr. Yael Latter of the University of Haifa. No organization tracks the numbers of eating disorders among Jewish women, which experts say is partly because of a cultural reluctance to divulge the illness. Studies in different countries and Latzer's research, however, indicate a high rate in Israel.
Some patients view eating disorders as a more culturally sanctioned form of rebellion in a religion where smoking and drinking are discouraged.
When Dr. Catherine Steiner-Adair arrived in Israel more than a decade ago amid pleas from Jewish activists alarmed by a spike in eating disorders, she recalls patients were so afraid to get help that they sent proxies.
"A nurse would come up to me on the street and say, `Please help me. I'm here on behalf of a 19-year-old girl who's lost 30 pounds (13 kilograms), but she can't ask for help because she comes from a very religious family and they think it's good (for her to be underweight) because it's better for marriage making,'" said Steiner-Adair, a clinical instructor in Harvard Medical School's psychiatry department. "I was overwhelmed by the needs and the requests."
Experts say the Orthodox community is sending mixed messages to young women. Parents, matchmakers and potential mates want svelte brides, but may shun women who divulge an eating disorders because of the stigma of mental illness.
For arranged marriages among the ultra-Orthodox, the first question matchmakers ask is about physical appearance, including weight and the mother's weight, which feeds the message that thinner brides are more desirable, said Dr. Ira Sacker, who practices in New York and has written several books including "Regaining Your Self."
In 1996, Sacker studied ultra-Orthodox and Syrian Jewish communities in Brooklyn and found that 1 out of 19 girls was diagnosed with an eating disorder, a rate about 50% higher than the general US population.
"It is of prime importance within the Jewish Orthodox community the bride appear to be as flawless as possible," said Rabbi Saul Zucker of the Orthodox Union, which represents Orthodox synagogues in North America.
A mental illness, such as an eating disorder "would be a terrible, terrible blemish and people will go to unbelievable lengths to hide it," he said.
Recent efforts are aiming to stop the trend. The Orthodox Union, which has been an advocate for treating drug abuse and other taboos in the Jewish community, recently released a documentary "Hungry to be Heard" about the illness and started two support groups in New York City.
After writing "Full of Ourselves," which became a phenomenon among those with eating disorders, their advocates and doctors. Dr. Steiner-Adair worked with the Hadassah Foundation to write "Bishvili, For Me," a Jewish guide to her previous book for day schools and camps.
Rigidity a perfect breeding ground
Experts say preoccupation with food are more pronounced in the Jewish community, whether it is planning an elaborate Shabbat dinner or generally following strict kosher laws. A lot of thought goes into what is eaten and abstained from.
Kosher laws forbid eating meat and dairy at the same meal, and forbid eating pork and shellfish. Separate dishes, silverware, sinks and microwaves may also be used for meat and milk products.
"This rigidity can really be a perfect breeding ground for an eating disorder. If you're already struggling with an eating disorder and now you have all these foods that you can't eat, it can be very difficult," said Jodi Krumholz, a dietitian at The Renfrew Center, a Philadelphia-based eating disorder treatment center.
The center treated nearly 200 Jewish patients this year, up markedly from 2009.
In Jerusalem, Rabbi Shimon Herskowitz said community activists approached him about starting a small eating-disorder facility where Jewish-American parents would be comforted knowing their daughters were among staff that followed the same religious rituals. But even those parents have been reluctant.
"They only send the kids when they are totally, totally desperate, when the kid is on the borderline of hospital or residential treatment," said Herskowitz who opened Beit Chaya V'Sarah in Jerusalem last year.
Leaving treatment and re-entering the tight-knit Orthodox culture also presents hurdles. For many, fasting on Yom Kippur or another holiday could cause them to relapse, but patients worry about being judged by others.
Waller felt guilty one holiday as she loaded her plate at a salad bar shortly after leaving treatment. She felt isolated from the community, unable to join in the ritual fast with the rest of her congregation, until she realized her greater sacrifice would be eating.
"For me it became the opposite. I had to give in to all the things that everyone else had been giving up," Waller said. "That was the light bulb that reconciled the Jewish dilemma I was facing with needing to be in recovery."
Steiner-Adair says effective prevention highlights part of the religion that can inoculate girls against dangerous body messages in Western culture.
"When you have a religion that says your body is the temple of your soul and you find ways to make that meaningful at 13, that can be a very powerful way to look quite critically at Calvin Klein anorexic-chic models," she said.
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| http://media.ebaumsworld.com/ :Image |
Health experts say illness remains widely ignored in Orthodox Jewish communities, as families worry the stigma of mental illness could ruin arranged marriages; strict food rituals of fasting and remaining kosher can also exacerbate problem
Associated Press
Hilary Waller remembers begging her mother to let her fast on Yom Kippur. At 10 years old she was a bit too young, but embracing the rigid discipline seemed desperately important.
"It felt like I was practicing not eating. It was something that was reassuring and gave me strength and a sense of pride," said Waller, a 28-year-old teacher at a religious school in Blue Bell, Pennsylvania.
Weighty Problem
Report: Child obesity high in Israel / Sarit Rosenblum
OECD report indicates 26% of Israeli children suffer from excessive weight, compared to 33% in US. Adult obesity rates lower at 17%
Full story
It was the same rush she got years later in college each time she saw the scale tip downward. Waller, who suffered from anorexia, starved herself until she stopped menstruating, lost some of her hair and was exercising several times a day.
Health experts say eating disorders are a serious, underreported disease among Orthodox Jewish women and to a lesser extent others in the Jewish community, as many families are reluctant to acknowledge the illness at all and often seek help only when a girl is on the verge of hospitalization.
Several studies indicate a rise in the problem, and those who treat eating disorders say they are seeing more Jewish patients. A new documentary, books and facilities have cropped up to help.
Waller's family, which belongs to the Conservative branch of Judaism, fasted only on Yom Kippur, but she began fasting other holidays. "And not for religious reasons," said Waller, who checked into residential treatment after college, more than a decade after she began struggling with the illness.
As eating disorders have become less taboo in mainstream US culture, they remain widely ignored in Orthodox Jewish communities, as families worry the stigma of mental illness could ruin arranged marriages for the patient and even her siblings. Strict food rituals of fasting and remaining kosher can also exacerbate the problem.
Mixed messages
Israel has one of the highest rates of anorexia, bulimia and binge eating in the world, said Dr. Yael Latter of the University of Haifa. No organization tracks the numbers of eating disorders among Jewish women, which experts say is partly because of a cultural reluctance to divulge the illness. Studies in different countries and Latzer's research, however, indicate a high rate in Israel.
Some patients view eating disorders as a more culturally sanctioned form of rebellion in a religion where smoking and drinking are discouraged.
When Dr. Catherine Steiner-Adair arrived in Israel more than a decade ago amid pleas from Jewish activists alarmed by a spike in eating disorders, she recalls patients were so afraid to get help that they sent proxies.
"A nurse would come up to me on the street and say, `Please help me. I'm here on behalf of a 19-year-old girl who's lost 30 pounds (13 kilograms), but she can't ask for help because she comes from a very religious family and they think it's good (for her to be underweight) because it's better for marriage making,'" said Steiner-Adair, a clinical instructor in Harvard Medical School's psychiatry department. "I was overwhelmed by the needs and the requests."
Experts say the Orthodox community is sending mixed messages to young women. Parents, matchmakers and potential mates want svelte brides, but may shun women who divulge an eating disorders because of the stigma of mental illness.
For arranged marriages among the ultra-Orthodox, the first question matchmakers ask is about physical appearance, including weight and the mother's weight, which feeds the message that thinner brides are more desirable, said Dr. Ira Sacker, who practices in New York and has written several books including "Regaining Your Self."
In 1996, Sacker studied ultra-Orthodox and Syrian Jewish communities in Brooklyn and found that 1 out of 19 girls was diagnosed with an eating disorder, a rate about 50% higher than the general US population.
"It is of prime importance within the Jewish Orthodox community the bride appear to be as flawless as possible," said Rabbi Saul Zucker of the Orthodox Union, which represents Orthodox synagogues in North America.
A mental illness, such as an eating disorder "would be a terrible, terrible blemish and people will go to unbelievable lengths to hide it," he said.
Recent efforts are aiming to stop the trend. The Orthodox Union, which has been an advocate for treating drug abuse and other taboos in the Jewish community, recently released a documentary "Hungry to be Heard" about the illness and started two support groups in New York City.
After writing "Full of Ourselves," which became a phenomenon among those with eating disorders, their advocates and doctors. Dr. Steiner-Adair worked with the Hadassah Foundation to write "Bishvili, For Me," a Jewish guide to her previous book for day schools and camps.
Rigidity a perfect breeding ground
Experts say preoccupation with food are more pronounced in the Jewish community, whether it is planning an elaborate Shabbat dinner or generally following strict kosher laws. A lot of thought goes into what is eaten and abstained from.
Kosher laws forbid eating meat and dairy at the same meal, and forbid eating pork and shellfish. Separate dishes, silverware, sinks and microwaves may also be used for meat and milk products.
"This rigidity can really be a perfect breeding ground for an eating disorder. If you're already struggling with an eating disorder and now you have all these foods that you can't eat, it can be very difficult," said Jodi Krumholz, a dietitian at The Renfrew Center, a Philadelphia-based eating disorder treatment center.
The center treated nearly 200 Jewish patients this year, up markedly from 2009.
In Jerusalem, Rabbi Shimon Herskowitz said community activists approached him about starting a small eating-disorder facility where Jewish-American parents would be comforted knowing their daughters were among staff that followed the same religious rituals. But even those parents have been reluctant.
"They only send the kids when they are totally, totally desperate, when the kid is on the borderline of hospital or residential treatment," said Herskowitz who opened Beit Chaya V'Sarah in Jerusalem last year.
Leaving treatment and re-entering the tight-knit Orthodox culture also presents hurdles. For many, fasting on Yom Kippur or another holiday could cause them to relapse, but patients worry about being judged by others.
Waller felt guilty one holiday as she loaded her plate at a salad bar shortly after leaving treatment. She felt isolated from the community, unable to join in the ritual fast with the rest of her congregation, until she realized her greater sacrifice would be eating.
"For me it became the opposite. I had to give in to all the things that everyone else had been giving up," Waller said. "That was the light bulb that reconciled the Jewish dilemma I was facing with needing to be in recovery."
Steiner-Adair says effective prevention highlights part of the religion that can inoculate girls against dangerous body messages in Western culture.
"When you have a religion that says your body is the temple of your soul and you find ways to make that meaningful at 13, that can be a very powerful way to look quite critically at Calvin Klein anorexic-chic models," she said.
Nov 29, 2010
Censorship Never Ends
Rabbonim Urge Public to Block 'Chareidi News Lines'
by Yated Ne'eman Staff
Gedolei Yisroel, including Maran HaRav Yosef Sholom Eliashiv shlita, are promoting a "tikkun godol" in response to one of the stumbling blocks of our day and age: home phone lines with access to numbers that have a corrupting impact and have claimed many victims.
In their public notice, maranan verabbonon warn against one of the great spiritual threats of today: "chareidi news lines," which fill their listeners with vapid messages and negative contents rife with loshon hora. These phone lines also present perverse worldviews and blatant disrespect for rabbonim, talmidei chachomim and gedolei Torah.
Roshei yeshivas, roshei kollelim, rabbonim and public figures have long warned against these phone lines, calling them a blight that destroys the Jewish soul by propagating loshon hora and blurring the boundaries between sacred and profane, between pure and tainted and through an atmosphere of levity that undermines aspirations to grow in Torah and yiras Shomayim.
Both the operators of these phone lines and those who collaborate with them make it their point to engage listeners in empty prattle, while generating dubious reports that are a world away from the hallowed halls of the beis medrash.
Rabbonim are even warning against chronic addiction to these phone lines, which pose a threat to any home founded on Torah and yir'oh, not to mention the high cost of listening to them.
Rabbonim Urge Public to Block 'Chareidi News Lines'
by Yated Ne'eman Staff
Gedolei Yisroel, including Maran HaRav Yosef Sholom Eliashiv shlita, are promoting a "tikkun godol" in response to one of the stumbling blocks of our day and age: home phone lines with access to numbers that have a corrupting impact and have claimed many victims.
In their public notice, maranan verabbonon warn against one of the great spiritual threats of today: "chareidi news lines," which fill their listeners with vapid messages and negative contents rife with loshon hora. These phone lines also present perverse worldviews and blatant disrespect for rabbonim, talmidei chachomim and gedolei Torah.
Roshei yeshivas, roshei kollelim, rabbonim and public figures have long warned against these phone lines, calling them a blight that destroys the Jewish soul by propagating loshon hora and blurring the boundaries between sacred and profane, between pure and tainted and through an atmosphere of levity that undermines aspirations to grow in Torah and yiras Shomayim.
Both the operators of these phone lines and those who collaborate with them make it their point to engage listeners in empty prattle, while generating dubious reports that are a world away from the hallowed halls of the beis medrash.
Rabbonim are even warning against chronic addiction to these phone lines, which pose a threat to any home founded on Torah and yir'oh, not to mention the high cost of listening to them.
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